Sign on local pet supply store:
"Win Free Dog Food
As Kus How"
Now, free dog food is likely as good at
the costly type, so why not? But, in what manner does a contestant
endeavor to win?
Must one dress up as Mr and/or Ms. How? Does the masquerade extend
to facial features/stature/hair, or is mere appearance/attire
all that is required? Must one take on the affectations of Mr./Mrs.
How, or just stand there politely waiting on the judges' decision?
Or is the first name of Mr./Ms. How a clue in some way? Should
the contestant assault the store, profanities dripping from lips?
Is this contest PG or R rated, because that makes a huge difference?
Or, are they really looking for a rare breed of canine, say, a
cross between a keeshound and a chow? Unfortunately, I do not
own a specimen of this exotic breed, nor do I care to skin one
out and wear the hide. If the rules are this rigorous, should
one not waste time competing needlessly? Any help you can give
would be greatly appreciated.